


You Can Lead a Horse to Water

by ThayerKerbasy



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, Pre-Canon, Unicorns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-19
Updated: 2019-09-19
Packaged: 2020-10-21 07:10:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20689541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThayerKerbasy/pseuds/ThayerKerbasy
Summary: Gabriel's dad said he was going to make it rain for forty days and forty nights, flooding the earth and killing the unworthy.  Gabriel didn't want to make any waves, but he didn't think that was entirely fair.





	You Can Lead a Horse to Water

“This is such a load of horse hooey,” said Gabriel as he coaxed the herd of unicorns to follow him with a bouquet of lollipops. The first hard candy made from sugarcane wasn’t scheduled to be invented for thousands of years yet, but Gabriel wasn’t about to let a little thing like chronology interfere with snack time.

The lead stallion snorted and stopped in his tracks, causing the rest of the herd to do the same. Gabriel held up his free hand (as well as the one holding the bouquet of lollipops) and hastened to reassure him. “Nononono, I didn’t mean you. You’re not a load of horse hooey, and I super wasn’t calling you or anyone in your herd a horse. Nooooo, I was talking about Dad’s latest stunt. Flooding this whole part of the planet and only letting his VIPs on the lifeboat is so him.”

Seemingly mollified, the unicorn took a step forward, but tried to snatch the lollipops while his guard was down. Gabriel danced back a few steps and laughed. “Uh uh, no way. Not until we get you guys to safety. Once I’m sure you’re not gonna get caught up in this flood nonsense, there’ll be candy for everyone. Until then, I’m just gonna need you to keep leading your herd so no one gets hurt.”

Gabriel wasn’t sure if unicorns could actually pout, but it sure looked like the stallion pouted. He took another step forward, though, so that was something.

“Doesn’t even make sense to me,” Gabriel muttered as he stepped backwards. “Sure, the people who fought over you were super guilty. Dad has every right to punish those greedy jerkwads. But you? All you did was exist. How is that your fault?”

The unicorn tossed his head so his shimmering silver mane rippled and shone in the sunlight, which didn’t really seem like a useful response. Behind him, the rest of the herd either sniffed the air for a whiff of the lollipops, or settled for eating the grass in front of them. What none of them did was move.

Gabriel looked at the portal to the fairy realm a mere two paces behind him. He’d been trying to get them to go through it for hours with no luck. “It’s ‘cause you’re stupid, isn’t it?”

The lead stallion raised his head and snorted, pawing the ground.

Shaking his head, Gabriel chuckled mirthlessly. “That’s it, isn’t it? If you were humans, you’d all be dumb blondes, too dense to leave when people are fighting over you, and too stupid to see when someone’s trying to save your damn life.”

He paused to take a single lollipop from the bunch and waved it in front of the portal. “Let’s make this a free-for-all. One lollipop, free for the taking.”

The entire herd focused on the single lollipop about to become available. He tossed it through the portal and stepped out of the way as the herd of unicorns raced to be the one to get a treat. Even after half the herd had gone through and it was obvious that one of them must have eaten it already, the rest still followed, just as excited.

As the last little baby unicorn disappeared through the portal, Gabriel decided to have pity on the poor dumb bastards. He tossed the rest of the lollipops through the portal, mojoing up a few more as he released, so a good couple dozen candies shimmered through to the fairy realm. The portal, having done its job, flickered and disappeared.

A job well done deserved a reward. Producing another lollipop from thin air, Gabriel found a likely rock and changed it (temporarily) into an overstuffed recliner. He gave himself the time it took to finish his candy before he’d have to go explain to the king of the faeries why he should take in a herd of refugee unicorns…and why he should do the same for the half dozen other herds Gabriel had yet to coax through portals. It was going to be a busy day. 

**Author's Note:**

> It's [Coldest Hits](https://spncoldesthits.tumblr.com/post/186990637661/september-2019-prompt-unicorn-connection-posting) time again! This month, we were asked to write a fic containing unicorns. I had no ideas (and was mostly busy writing the end of [Unfamiliar Territory](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20639192/chapters/49010339)) until a few days ago, at which point the shower decided to gift me with this inspiration.


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